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Freak Genius
Introduction
Ragamuffin! So you think you’ve lived? If you haven’t heard any music for ‘Freak Penius’ I mean ‘Freak Genius’ then you haven’t lived!
Are you breathing right now? Then if you were breathing as you were reading this I guess you’ve lived.
But what about the dead though? Have they heard any songs for ‘Freak Genius’?
I guess not, they’re missing out!
There are a lot of people thinking who the fuck are ‘Freak Genius’?
Well they are probably the longest surviving band that ever came out of HPS.
I remember when I was a kid there was this tall Indian guy, he was basically an Indian tower. He used to moonwalk and had some really fresh dance moves.
This guy was the first person I ever saw perform at HPS, I’m talking about the real school not the fictional internet based site “Holland Parke School”.
Anyway, he was singing stuff like “I’m a loser”, and “Never give up”.
People were screaming, they went crazy; he was wearing white socks and lifted up his trousers to reveal his nicely waxed legs.
All the guys watching were going wild, I never really understood why.
That performance was basically the most freshest the school had ever seen and it was never matched.
Until one day I hear that some band called “Freak Genius” is going to play at the school assembly, they were like a bunch of 14 year olds I think, but this was a long time.
I’m like let’s see what they got; at least the teachers fucked off the stage!
So all I see is some fat bitch, and another hoe, I’m like what the fuck?
Then as usual there’s a guitarist and drummer and shit, but I didn’t care.
The girls looked like they were from “Right said Fred”.
I was holding a camera at the time thinking this was going to be a fond memory.
But this was bullshit; I was like “Get the fuck out of my lens you fucking sluts!!!”
The best part of that performance was when they got off the stage.
How the band evolved
Prepare to be schooled! HPS style!
The band started of just like any other band without any direction; they recruited two desperate girls who were experts at screaming like a bunch of sluts who wanted to suck anyone’s nuts.
What happened was Joolz (the lead singer of the band) along with his friend Perez (ex-member, drummer) and Mike (founding member) joined up with Jade (ex-member slapper), Rory (ex-member recently got beaten up) and Sahar (ex member).
Joolz, Perez and Mike didn’t quite know what they were doing there in the first place.
They didn’t even know who the other two were.
This band was known as “Freak Genius”.
Thankfully Rory, Jade and Sahar (another slut) left the band shortly to form their own band entitled “The Bitches”.
Perez also left the band, and was later replaced by Amir (on drums).
The name however remained “Freak Genius”.
They now have a website, and a board, and an E.P. This is what they achieved now!
When the two ex-members Jade and Sahar were part of the line up, the only thing they achieved is giving people a headache, where your ears would be ringing for hours.
You’d hear them singing “I like it up the ass” hours after their performance.
If you saw the state of the band now compared to back then, you wouldn’t believe how good they’ve become.
So I’m standing here supporting them, what do you think most of the pupils at HPS are thinking of me right now? Not very much.
A lot of people are not taking me seriously and a couple of people who’ve subscribed to our e-mail based newsletter were asked whether they had anything to ask “Freak Genius” if they accepted an interview.
You would be surprised how many people had questions to ask, and very stupid ones like some guy who wanted to know “Is your dick big blad?”
Sorry but I didn’t ask them anything about their dick sizes, I suggest if you want to find out, go suck them off, then I’ll be asking you “How does it feel to have a mans cock in your mouth?”
The Official Holland Parke School Interview with Joolz
Ladies and gentlemen, this is something I’m sure many of you have been waiting for.
So relax your nipples and nut sacks, this is some fresh ass shit you’re about to enjoy.
Joolz takes time off to chill and talk to us about “Freak Genius”, for your viewing pleasure we’ve taken the liberty of placing the interview in sections.
We notice there a lot of lazy readers out there, I assure you the interview is tight and well worth reading.
Joolz even answers questions our users have put to him, and man are they wild!
Joolz talks about the band line up
HPS: Ok this has
to be a question that I really wanted to ask. Your line up has changed a lot
over the year’s right, can you describe the
changes?
Joolz: well we started off as a bunch of idiots, then as the numbers became fewer, the idiocy did too.
HPS: you see I remember two girls in your group, one was quite chubby and the other skinny.
Joolz: yes jade was the troll like one and Sahar the other well for a brief period Sahar was a member too, mainly because she was a friend of the other singer but we never performed with her
HPS: so you just played music for them to add vocals to?
Joolz: if only it were that simple, neither could sing a note but we weren’t exactly great song writers at the time.
HPS: So you didn't depart from them on good terms?
Joolz: hmmm, I’m not sure, the only way I can describe the change is that we sort of ignored them in a hope that they would just go away, it worked.
Jade just disappeared and Sahar just carried on with her over exaggerated tragedy of a life.
HPS: What sort of tragic life was Sahar subjected to? Her mum accidentally washed her white socks with her pink socks? How did it feel performing in front of 2000 students at HPS?
Joolz: Yeah that was probably enough to set her off on a binge. Performing live, great fun, more people cheered than booed.
HPS: could you actually hear anyone booing?
Joolz:
There’s usually a few, we weren’t exactly socially popular or very talented.
Joolz talks about HPS
HPS: How did people at Holland
Park School treat you? You see I went there and I feel as if people there just
like to bitch.
Joolz: Well no matter where you go there's always gonna be conflicts, but I started off as a very unpopular, uncool person, when I started getting into music and performing that changed.
I was more confident, happy, deodorised, people recognised me; although some people recognised me and felt that I was to be shouted at.
HPS: To be shouted at? Is that teachers or also pupils who took part in that?
Joolz: I’m talking about the students that see me and start playing air guitar, thinking that they look cool in front of their friends as they try to humiliate me.
HPS: Do they actually get kicks out of that?
Joolz: I guess, as you know, HPS is full of simple people
HPS: have they actually done anything with their lives?
Joolz: Well I’d like to think that they went on and did a better job of what they're criticising for, but it’s not gonna happen too often.
HPS: does it bother you in anyway?
Joolz: if it does, I get over it soon enough, its not worth stressing about people that have nothing better to do than try and bring you down, especially when there is much tunage to be made.
HPS: Because I’ve also noticed that in your “Book” section of your site there are a couple of negative responses are you used to that?
Joolz: Yeah, some of it's probably Amir Ha-ha, but I’m not gonna try and hunt down who posted anonymously on my site saying that "we shouldn’t have our music on the net when it sucks"(that one was before we put music up there).
HPS: So it’s obviously some deranged person.
Many people have described you as a kind and gentle soul who likes to listen to slipknot. What do you like about slipknot?
Joolz: ha-ha, ok here goes...
They’re a very misunderstood band, fact is most people hear the criticisms about them before the music, but what I like about them (and in a lot of the other music I like) is the expression of emotion.
Their vocalist is an excellent singer, even though the 'haters' see him as some guy shouting a lot, also it is very difficult to arrange songs for so many instruments.
HPS: Well the vocalist does sing like he's vomiting.
Joolz: At times, but maybe he’s trying to express his sickness.
HPS: But they call their fans maggots, are you happy with that label?
Joolz: I’ve
been called worse things. Also I like percussion; slipknot has a lot of that.
Joolz talks about music
HPS: What band/bands would you
say has influenced you?
Joolz: Ok, well there’s Metallica for the chugging metal sounds, but most of my playing is influenced by Tom Morello of rage against the machine and Audioslave.
I know Amir is heavily influenced by Deftones and Tool and Mike is more into punkier type stuff.
HPS: Then what type of music would you say your band plays?
Joolz: hard rock, I’m keeping it simple because there are so many different genres, so I’m saying its rock and it’s slightly on the harder side.
HPS: Would you say it's in anyway similar to slipknot?
Joolz: No, although I’m influenced by Corey Taylor’s (slipknot singer) singing, not the shouting, I don’t do that much, but when he sings, he does a lot of singing in his other band stone sour.
HPS: I notice you don't shout
Joolz: I’m capable, just haven’t managed to fit it into a song.
HPS: Ok one time I heard some guys playing some papa roach songs and a muse song I want to know was that you guys?
It could be heard from the music studio someone was playing between ‘angels and insects’.
Joolz: Well that was most likely Amir’s old band, I jammed with them a few times, they were called ‘Eudaimonia’, I’m not sure on the spelling but neither were they.
Their guitarist had to go back to his country and their singers taste in music rapidly changed.
HPS: Moving
on...Does your band try and solve the problems of the world like what is the
motive of your music?
Joolz: Well I don’t know shit about politics or current issues so no, we don’t solve anything, I guess our motive is mainly to entertain, so I guess that makes us more of a distraction from the world’s problems.
HPS: But an entertaining distraction unlike the spice girls.
Joolz: You don’t find the spice girls entertaining?
HPS: Well in a sexual way, but they're not very talented.
Joolz: I guess the novelty wears thin very quickly.
HPS: I took a look briefly at your forum and one of the posts was about an ex-member being beaten up, how do you feel about the incident? I mean is the guy still a friend or an enemy?
Joolz: I wasn’t there, but it’s not a serious incident, I just think he got on the wrong side of a no-nonsense Thai kid. friend not an extremely close friend.
HPS: I mean is the guy still a friend or an enemy?
Joolz: Friend not an extremely close friend.
HPS: “I’m trying to pick up the pieces while I sit here in the dark” What’s that about?
Joolz: Most of my lyrics are generally about confusion, there have been many times where I wasn’t sure what the fuck was going on, not really with people around me but mainly in my own head, I’m better now, no need for padded walls or anything, I think I just took a few too many hits to the head back then. And it’s quite a funny experience, its kind of like watching yourself trip over.
HPS: Were you in a lot of fights?
Joolz: I used to do martial arts twice a week
HPS: Is there anything about leading a dark life?
Joolz: I’m not sure what you mean by a dark life, I like to think that I lead a straight forward, no bullshit life.
HPS: So you're nothing like Marilyn Manson.
Joolz: No, no, I’m not even a fan, although I can’t deny liking a few of his songs.
HPS: How would you describe HPS, the school?
Joolz: Well it’s less of a land mark now, seeing as Mr. Hal has brought in uniforms and the 'cool modern' feel to the look of the building is an embarrassment.
HPS: If you notice only the ground floor is decorated. Have you been to his office? Maybe he's making the school better for visitors.
Joolz: Indeed he has, there’s a visitors section although the whole school is decorated now, he started at his office and extended from there.
Joolz answers to those wacky e-mails
HPS: Yeah ok I have to tell you something when I told a couple of people I know that I was going to be interviewing FG they wanted to ask you a couple of questions.
Joolz: Ha,
ha.
HPS: Among them are critics and among them are idiots.
Joolz: Yeah I bet.
HPS: Would you be willing to answer some of their dumb questions?
Joolz: Sure it beats whatever’s on TV
HPS: We've even received three e-mails by people who don't want you to know why they are.
Joolz: I’m used to that
HPS: Probably so you don't beat them up.
Joolz: Grrr
HPS: Ok first up is it true that Amir has a glass eye? (Drummer)
Joolz: hmm, I’m not really in a position to say, but its possible his depth perceptions alright though.
HPS: This one is about the whole band; ok this isn't really a question more of a request “We want to see some nude pictures!!!” What do you say to that?
Joolz: Well if you hang around long enough you're likely to see my arse but naked isn’t too likely.
HPS: Ok this is a smart ass one. So are you guys really geniuses or just guys who make music and play with your penises?
Joolz: Bit of both really I often find my self playing a riff.
HPS: Quite a personal one. How would you describe your sex life?
Joolz: You wanna ask mike that one, he tends to watch whether I like it or not, I don’t think I ever like him watching but it doesn’t stop him, but otherwise my sex life is healthy and fun, like play dough.
HPS: Ok another one from the same person. Have you been sleeping with anyone in the past month?
Joolz: Is this gonna end up as a blind date or something? I don’t have any stuffed animals so no.
HPS: It could be a secret admirer this was a girl. Next, we’ve heard a rumour that you’ve been shot 7 times, is there any truth in that?
Joolz: Aren’t I the lucky one? Well I’ve taken a few paintball shells and now I walk with a gangsta limp nah, it’s not all bad living in the ghetto of shepherds bush.
HPS: Another girl wants to ask.
A lot of
girls and undecided men are asking a very crucial question, are you single?
Joolz: No comment.
HPS: I’ve heard that you tried to fire a bazooka at David Blaine when he was locked up like an idiot in a cage, why would you do such a thing?
Joolz: Because he was acting like a twat, he should have been on the street doing street magic like he does best, not sitting in a stupid box getting hungry.
HPS: I remember at one point the site was shut down due to some people from another site claiming you stole their thunder, and some of their users relieved themselves of their frustration on your board. What was the real issue?
Joolz: The site never shut down because of that, its all to do with another site made by a Holland park student, his site was 'urban 90', and the not-so-friendly people at 'urban 75' didn’t like that and attacked his board, I was a member of the urban 90 board and had a link to freakgenius.com, and you know how retards stampede.
HPS: What would you say is the best song your bands ever came up with?
Joolz: Screaming through the dark is our best so far, some of our new ideas are sounding great too so next time we hit the studio we'll see how it turns out.
HPS: What were your fondest memories in being a student at Holland Park?
Joolz: Hmm the ones where I was drunk are hazy but performing at the "urban cool" show was great fun.
HPS: Do you drink a lot?
Joolz: Not as much now, but before I'd usually have a bottle of vodka in my pocket.
HPS: Are there any plans for gigs or other events?
Joolz: Not really, we're very unorganised at the moment with Mike and Amir doing GCSEs.
HPS: So it appears as if they're younger than you are.
Joolz: Yeah and in the mean time I make electronic music in my room yeah there’s a 2 year difference.
HPS: How would you describe the change from your band then, to your band now, has it changed for the better or for worse?
Joolz: Much better, much, much better, no more covers.
Final question
HPS: What would you like to say to your fans or anyone who hasn’t heard of your band?
Joolz: hmm, well a polite "hello and how are you?" wouldn’t hurt, and "hey, come on over and have a listen" and as Amir will tell you if you ever want to use his toilet, "don’t piss around the bowl".
Official Holland Parke School review
“Freak Genius” have actually released a 5 track E.P for those that don’t know.
The 3 songs from the E.P are available for download at www.freakgenius.com, this link can also be found on the extensions page.
To locate the Mp3’s go to the “Freak Genius” website and click on ‘stuff’.
If you are too busy I’ve taken the liberty of placing the links to those songs all you have to do is right click and save target to desktop:
You’ll notice a lot of the titles begin with the letter ‘S’.
Could it be a fetish with the letter ‘S’?
I bet some of these sick people out there reading this will probably do a picture search on Google for the letter ‘S’.
Now its time to review their stuff, to find out what I’m talking about download at least one song.
Some other time
Those who went to “Urban Cool” will remember the band playing a Marilyn Manson cover and ending the show with the Buffy theme. They didn’t play that long but it was their first gig.
Back then the line up was Rory, Perez, Joolz and Mike.
Rory left the group, as did Perez.
So “Freak Genius” should have died, but they can never die, they’ve had more line up changes than Robbie Fowlers had cock.
This song is great to listen to when you’re partner is nagging you for sex and you’re like hey dude: Some other time.
You’ve noticed I don’t have an eloquent tongue, I’m not clever and I don’t try to be.
For those who want to know who sings on the tracks, all vocals are by Joolz, they probably need a FAQ on their site to answer this question, its been asked so many times.
This track is the shortest of the three up for download.
The melody to this song is probably the best of the three; I suggest you listen to this song even though “Screaming through the dark” is their best song in their opinion and to a lot of other registered users at their forum.
Although the drumming fails in some parts the song is excellent, this is no way an insult to Amir’s drumming because I reckon he’s the best drummer the group have ever had.
The ending to this song reminds me a bit of Marilyn Manson’s ending to “Irresponsible hate anthem”.
Screaming through the dark
This track starts of like a sad song; this is probably something a couple of sick people who search for pictures on Google could wank to!
Then suddenly the song emerges as if out of nowhere, it seems to be the most personal song to the band.
I’m not sure if I read in their forum that it was meant to have Mike backing Joolz in the chorus, it seems like they’ve put two loops of the same vocals instead.
This was meant to emphasise the chorus, probably because it really is a special song to them.
Like as if the songs were their children I am sure all their songs are special to them.
Still stuck
The beginning to this song sounds like “Screaming through the dark”, they probably like it so much they tried to imitate it a bit.
I think Joolz actually swears in this song, naughty, naughty. And he does it twice!
This song is probably the rockiest thing they have to offer.
With its angry drums and angry guitar, they even have a ‘Bon Jovi’ thing going on in between.
If you want to see what they’re about check this song out all three members are performing in top form.
The drumming is excellent, and Joolz takes it away with some crazy guitar riff.
Right after that Joolz makes way for Amir to tap his two sticks together and do some crazy drumming.
I think this track was them proving themselves to all their critics, for what they’re worth as a group.
I know a lot of people remember the band with the two girls who used to shout because they didn’t understand shit about music.
They thought the world owed them I guess, that’s why they were shouting.
I’d like to finish this article by saying if you read all of this I hope you enjoyed it.
I’d like to wish everyone a merry Christmas; Freak Genius would like to also wish you a very merry Christmas and a freaky new year.
To all those hoes who like to criticise HPS and “FG”, this shit is for ex-HPS students who are down with us, we’re talking to each other not them other hoes, we shudder those hoes to the back rows!
Visit: www.freakgenius.com don’t forget about us though!
2003 © Holland Parke School